


And our story will grow old..

by WriterInTheDark19



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Season/Series 03, S3E8, Season/Series 03, Season/Series 04, he loves her, he misses her sm, i hope i did his character justice, mike daydreaming wheeler, mileven reunion, mileven/jancy parallels, s4 mileven, this one is sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-17
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-15 16:36:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28816473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WriterInTheDark19/pseuds/WriterInTheDark19
Summary: Mike wheeler had two big fears. One of them was losing someone he loves. The other was dealing with loss.
Relationships: Eleven | Jane Hopper/Mike Wheeler
Comments: 10
Kudos: 15





	1. And when you fade away..

**Author's Note:**

> this is one of my first fics so its probably not the best quality, but i needed some post s3 mike angst so i decided to do it myself.. english is not my first language so there might be a couple spelling or grammar mistakes, but i hope you can look past it.. this is quite a short read but enjoy!!

The smell of cardboard boxes and a house of forgotten childhood memories, happiness, growth and pain that would soon belong to someone else. The tiny house felt so much bigger as he walked through the almost completely empty living room. A sense of bitterness overtook him for just a moment, a sad nostalgia. A feeling like a fork against a porcelain plate or scratching against a chalkboard - the house being this vacant so wrong. 

His heart stopped for a second. His eyes were now glued to her, to her soft brown eyes even if he could only see one of them. His bones suddenly melted and he swore he could drop any moment. The effect her presence still had on his heart. She was trying for anything to reach that teddy bear. Poor thing.

“ _t_ _hey’ll come back, i know they will._ ”

he reached for the bear, thankful that he'd inherited the tall gene. She looked happy, at peace. That made him feel so much better. She was glowing. She was truly the strongest person he'd ever met.

_“thanks”_

  
  


_“packed your walkie right?”_

  
  


_“yes.”_

  
  


_“because you know that i'm gonna steal cerebro from Dustin and call you so much you're gonna have to turn it off, right?”_

  
  


She let out a little laugh and he zoned out for a second, just looking at her.

  
  


_“did you talk to your mom? about thanksgiving?”_

  
  


_“yeah, I got the ok, i'll be there. And i was thinking maybe you could come up here for christmas, and Will too. You could come before or after christmas or whatever Mrs Byers wants, but i was thinking christmas day could be super fun because we'd all have cool new presents to play with and uh… sorry, that made me sound like a seven year old”_

  
  


Dammit. He messed it up. And it was actually going well.

  
  


_“i like presents too”_

_“yeah, cool, yeah. I like, i like presents too”_

_  
  
_

Suddenly he was drenched in cold regret of ever speaking. He wanted nothing more than to run so far away. He was being so embarrassing, she was just pitying him at that point. 

_  
  
_

_“cool”_

_  
  
_

As she turned to leave the room he felt a deep desire to turn around and tell her not to leave. To tell her that he loved her. But in that moment his fear was stronger. The last time he tried to tell her he almost peed his pants, and now he just tried to talk to her about christmas and he still messed it up. Maybe she doesn't even love him back. 

_  
  
_

_“Mike?”_

_  
  
_

A tiny wave of shock consumed him. No words could describe the feeling of the twist in his stomach and the beat of his heart every time she said his name.

_  
  
_

_“yeah?”_

_  
  
_

_“remember that day.. at the cabin? you were talking to max”_

_  
  
_

_“uhh i don't think i follow”_

_  
  
_

_“you talked about your - your feelings.. your heart?”_

His heart dropped. 

What had he done?

She knew. She heard everything he said. “your feelings.. your heart”. She described him saying he loved her as talking about “his heart” and that just made it melt. His nerves overtook him completely, and he was trying for anything to come up with something to say. 

_  
  
_

_“oh.. oh, yeah that, man that was so long ago um..”_

_  
  
_

He was scratching the back of his head like his life depended on it, and he was so sure that she could clearly see how anxious he was.

_“no, it was just heat of the moment stuff and uhh.. what did i say exactly?”_

  
  


_“Mike..”_

  
  


She was moving towards him with these eyes that looked.. disappointed, as if she was expecting him to tell her. If he wasn't sure she'd heard everything he said in the cabin he certainly was now. 

But she was also looking at him almost affectionately? 

She wasn't gonna say it was she?

With every step she took towards him his heartbeats became a little more frequent until she was so close and he could barely breathe. She put a hand to his cheek. 

Is she gonna say it?

  
  


_“i love you too”_

  
  


He wasn't breathing anymore. His heart was gonna beat out of his chest. She was so close. She was leaning in towards him and even if he felt like he couldn't move at all he still found it in himself to lean in just a bit. His lips were now on hers again, and that didn't help his whole not breathing - heart beating out of his chest thing. She was so so close. She smiled at him before she turned to leave the room. When she was out of sight he silently sat down in the corner and just stayed there. He couldn't believe it. 

* * *

A beautiful October sunset in Hawkins had never felt this dark, this grey or this hopeless. The front door to the quiet house on maple street opened with a tiny noise so unnoticeable that no one would know that Mike was home if he didn't immediately announce his presence by walking right to the doorframe of the kitchen. Everyone knew that he had been dreading that day for months. everyone else had been dreading that day for months. But this was so much worse. He felt as though someone had ripped his heart out of his chest and crushed it to pieces in front of his face. Nothing had prepared him for what this felt like.

Everyday was a nightmare back then. The coldest wind consumed him more and more, until he felt numb. The image of her looking back at him like she was saying goodbye forever and him opening his teary eyes to find her gone without a trace. He remembers the week after way too clearly. He would fall asleep so late in the night because he spent hours crying when he was laying in bed. It took so long for him to get back to normal, or somewhat normal. Every time he called and she did not answer it hurt a little more. Whatever he did and however many months passed it was constantly in the back of his mind. He never truly got to escape that feeling until she came back. He was not good at loss. He was not good at grief. 

And he knew it. 

**They say you don't remember pain, but is that true for the worst pain you've ever felt?**

He realized that more than anything his biggest fear was that this feeling was gonna come back. He didn't know if he was strong enough. He was seeking comfort in his mom. He couldn't remember when he had last come to his parents about any of his struggles. 

He was frozen, stiff. He did not know if he was ready to do that again. The uncertainty made him even more scared of what was to come. 

  
  


As night time approached he had been laying in bed for hours. Of course this wasn't comparable to last time. He knew she was ok. She was somewhere, just not with him. This was nothing like last time, this was probably what was best for her anyway. But that didn't stop his miserable heart from hurting every second, his exhausted mind from thinking about anything else, the heavy weight on his chest from wrecking him and tearing him to pieces, and his sad tears from falling down his tired face. He tried to comfort himself with the thought that he'd see her again soon, for christmas or thanksgiving. But he knew deep down that it was unrealistic. They had moved too far away and they had a house and furniture to pay for and a bunch of other things. it just wasn't happening. She actually loved him. She really loved him and now she was gone.

* * *

_If you asked most people at Hawkins high, Mike Wheeler was his usual self. Friendly, but quiet, and obviously a huge nerd. But to other people, specifically Max Mayfield, Dustin Henderson and Lucas Sinclair, something had shifted within him..._

  
  
  



	2. Find me a way, i'll be yours in a landslide

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mike Wheeler was alone.
> 
> He had been for a while, as the last inch of the sun was setting and he only had his tiny flashlight to guide him through the forest. He didn't know where he was anymore and he couldn't recognize anything. He tried to contact Dustin, then Max, then Lucas, and then Dustin again, but none of them were picking up and every minute his worry grew. He felt like he wasn't in Hawkins anymore. Hours passed and he felt like giving up. Where was everyone? Were they in danger? was El safe?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was gone for a while but i'm back!! i hope you enjoy this fic, and please feel free to give feedback!!

Mike Wheeler was alone.

He had been for a while, not physically but more with his feelings, thoughts and worries. He had Dustin, sometimes Nancy, Lucas was still nice even if he’d been acting different lately, and hell he even had Max. But he could not open up to them completely like he probably needed to, when his struggle was about a love he felt, a love too deep to even put into words in the first place. They’d heard everything they needed to hear in the cabin and they were certainly not getting any more details. None of those people could change the fact that there was a deep hole in his chest. He tried to seek a sense of comfort he could not find ever since she left.

Oh yeah, she.. left again.

He would find a way to remind himself of that every minute throughout the day. It was the image of her saying she loved him - making every inch of him scream and crumble yet not being able to move or say anything. The way she looked at him when she said that never left his mind. It sometimes made him feel like she was still with him - like he could hold her. He would fall into a deep state of daydreaming that would last seconds before he woke up and it would just hurt. It hurt so much. His reality after her was very disappointing. It's not that his friends weren’t enough, it's that he wasn’t complete without her. He realized that he could not only imagine a world where they weren’t separated, he could imagine a world where being her wasn’t dangerous. He could imagine a world where nothing was trying to hurt them and he became addicted to it as his reality was becoming more and more unpleasant and uninteresting. He would go from zoning out into his dreamland to actively trying to shut everything out to live in this other place, this happy place. He didn’t have the strength to argue, fight or try anymore. when he felt like he was so bad at getting his point across and trying to explain what he meant, not saying anything at all was easier. Not showing up was not only easier, but the only thing he was capable of doing. Distancing himself from everything for at least a couple of days was the only thing he really had the strength to do.

There was a certain blanket fort in the basement that understood him like no one else in the world did, when El wasn't around that was. He didn't even have to say anything and it understood everything he felt and everything he went through. This was where he would close his eyes and live out his perfect life.

_Mike Wheeler and El Hopper became friends in the 4th grade. well, he definitely knew who she was before they became friends. In the 1st grade they were desk mates. He was that annoying kid that kept raising his hand at every single question the teacher asked, but she was the only one that didn’t find it annoying. She would smile at him and when he noticed for the first time he was a blushing mess and since then he had a tiny crush on her. What really brought them together was when the teacher made the class do anonymous pen pals to actually just give back to the class. They both happened to get very personal in those letters because they had a certain kind of trust for each, an unspoken bond._

Mike turned his head to the other side of the pillow and pulled his blanket closer to his face.

_When they found out that their pen pals were each other they started hanging out much more. They went to the movie theater, to the arcade, went to get ice cream, went to the library and she got along with the party so well. He just kind of lived with his big crush on her until he felt like the time was right to ask her out, to see if she felt the same way and hope she would still be friends with him if she didn’t. She did, and they went to the snowball together in 7th grade. They danced for hours and had their first kiss and ditched the dance right before it was over to go to an empty gas station to get slushies and drive around town a bit. They were inseparable. People at school were annoyed at them and jealous of them all while not really caring about them at the same time. But none of that ever really mattered when they had each other. they could be free and do whatever they wanted and everyone could think and say whatever they wanted. In the 9th grade they went to a festival and it was some of the best days of their lives. All their favorite artists were somehow playing in Indianapolis and it was too good to be true. There were so many people there and yet they felt so close, sometimes like they were the only two people there. They treasured those days forever. They went to the mall and he waited outside the changing room to see her in something new and beautiful every time she came out. He didn’t get why so many guys hated that activity, it felt like a reward to spend so much time with her. After they graduated they went to college together, and having her glued to his everyday life like that was everything he could ever ask for. He wanted to see the world with her one day. they were gonna see the world together one day-_

And then Mike woke up.

And this time it hurt more than usual. Even if he was always reminded how he didn’t have her with him it could somehow still hit him like a truck. This time he just couldn’t take it. before he even realized how upset he was he had tears streaming down his face and he found himself destroying the very thing that brought him comfort, the blanket fort. _Why are you doing this to yourself? Aren’t you just pathetic?_.

He sat in the silence of the ruins of the fort and watched the ceiling as he tried to accept how he was feeling, and as much as he wanted to move on he still needed to cry. A faint noise came from his backpack. He could not make it out completely but it was giving him flashbacks from a certain fourth of July where he was at a grocery store.

"Mike, do you copy? This is a code red.” Now he could hear Dustin's voice clear as day. In one big reach he got a hold of his walkie.

“This is Mike, I copy”, he said almost apologetically.

“Oh, thank god” Dustin said, clearly relieved.

“Wheeler, where the fuck have you been?” Steve Harrington said, surprising Mike.

“Probably wallowing in self pity” someone whispered in the background, someone that sounded a lot like Max. She had no idea.

“Very funny” Mike said, not really caring about her jokes anymore.

“What's up?” Mike asked, knowing something was really wrong, and he would've known even if dustin hadn't said code red.

“Shits fucked up again and Jonathan and the kids couldn't find Joyce or Murray anywhere.. and i don’t wanna worry you but we don’t know where Jonathan and the rest of them are either now, its like they disappeared” Steve said, and Mike's face fell. Nothing mattered but making sure they were okay now.

“Where are you guys?” Mike asked, already gathering his things to get out.

“We’re trying to stop this shit, we’re in the forest.” Steve said.

“Where in the forest?” Mike asked with coldness but concern in his voice.

“That's kinda the thing.. we don’t know”

“I’m on my way” Mike said, before shutting off his walkie

“Wait mike-” Nancy said, but he'd shut it off.

Mike Wheeler was alone.

He had been for a while, as the last inch of the sun was setting and he only had his tiny flashlight to guide him through the forest. He didn't know where he was anymore and he couldn't recognize anything. He tried to contact Dustin, then Max, then Lucas, and then Dustin again, but none of them were picking up and every minute his worry grew. He felt like he wasn't in Hawkins anymore. Hours passed and he felt like giving up. _Where was everyone? Were they in danger? was El safe?_

Mike had isolated himself at the worst time possible, when everyone needed him. He just thought they were being dumb again. Tensions between hellfire and the tigers had been extra high lately and he was just tired of it, but this issue obviously seemed to be much bigger, He let everyone down. The only noise in the dark of the empty woods was his footsteps and his yelling after Nancy, Dustin and anyone. That was until he suddenly heard a branch breaking from a couple meters away. He pointed his light at the direction of the sound, but it started flickering and Mike's heart started racing. The light stopped working all together and he heard something that sounded like growling.

He hid behind a tree. He stayed as silent as he possibly could and closed his eyes. He just wanted to be back home. Something was approaching him. He took a deep breath. Suddenly, the thing started running away like it had been called for something else. Mike sighed in relief and tried to look for a way out. He couldn't find anything in the dark, only after walking for about a minute did he notice a weird red light coming from a tree. It looked like a gate of some sort. _Was he in the upside down?_ It was too dark to tell, but he did not remember going into the upside down. He approached the hole in the tree and tried to get through, but it was almost impossible. He was on the verge of giving up when he felt something - someone grabbing his hands on the other side. His arms were almost completely trough when he felt other people try to pull him through too. He didn't think it was possible but his head came through the hole in the tree and he landed in the arms of someone, her.

The first thing he noticed was how much lighter and brighter everything was on the other side even though it was in the middle of the night. He had definitely been in the upside down, but he was home now. He didn't need to look at her to recognize her. El had come home. She came home and saved him. Jonathan, Will and a boy with really long dark hair was there too. They all saved him. He held on to her so tight.

“You came home” he whispered. El didn't say anything, she just let out a small sob. Mike pulled out of the hug to look at her, and when he met her eyes his heart skipped twice as many beats as when he was hiding from the monster just minutes ago. She had the same big eyes as always, but she also changed. Her hair was a lot longer, and she had it tied into a low ponytail but the front pieces were out and framed her face. He felt like she could read him like a book, like she could tell everything he was feeling with just a look. She could tell how down he'd been. He knew it. The expression on her face became even more worried and he quickly realized that he was crying. Even though he was dirty from going through that gate and had disgusting slime all over him, she pulled him into a light kiss. His heart was beating that fast again and the world stopped. They were still laying on the ground, El on her knees with Mike in her arms. He leaned into that kiss like his life depended on it, like he would lose her again the next second. Neither of them cared that anyone was there. A couple seconds that he wanted to last forever ended, and he rested his forehead against hers and sighed.

“I don't wanna rush you guys but we have to go right now” Jonathan said, before Mike looked at him in agony.

“We have to find the others, my sister could be in there” Mike breathed.

Jonathan took a deep breath and closed his eyes. He looked like he could cry any second. “you need sleep and you need a shower. We will continue to look for them” Jonathan sighed, but was immediately cut off by Mike, “No, we are not splitting up again”.

“You're right” Jonathan murmured. “It's not safe for us to be here right now, so let's go home and try to contact them again” Jonathan continued.

“Come on, lets go” Will sighed as he helped El and Mike back on their feet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't think s4 will be like this btw, i just needed a setting for s4 mileven reunion.. I hope you liked this!! i'm very new to writing but i really enjoy it

**Author's Note:**

> that was it i hope you liked it!! please give feedback or comment if you want to<3 chapter 2 will be about how he deals with El being gone..


End file.
